I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize