ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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