I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Randomize
