Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
My dick has a subreddit
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
