i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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