You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
