I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
