the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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