Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
