everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
