so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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