and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Girls should come with a carfax report
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
