I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Randomize
