Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
