Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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