I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
She bit a glass in half.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
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