i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
