Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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