My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize