ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
