Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
