Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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