We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
