That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
