you guys were way drunker than both of me
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
