I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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