Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
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