Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
smell my finger.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
