i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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