so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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