Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I deserve this hangover.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
