I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Let's paint friendship bongs
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
