no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
