I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
