My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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