He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
