5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
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