Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
