Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize