i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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