in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
