Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I enjoy the company of your penis
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
