bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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