Whoa Z and x make the same sound
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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