I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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