Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
