THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
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