we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
17 year olds will be the death of me.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
