I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Randomize
