didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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